I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
