Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
