I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
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