all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
Randomize
