I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Randomize