i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
I am available for nakedness
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
