Where is the hickey?
Here's a fun fact your kittens ate my vomit last night
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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