best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
Randomize
