Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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