When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
Randomize
