After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
Randomize