And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
So, my ex just showed me the drunk voicemail we left him last night. Started out with me saying "I think it's Shane." Then you took my phone and started singing a song about peanut butter, train tracks, and tequila. I joined in. On the upside, he said he's totally fine with being on the drunk dial list from now on. Soooo, another tequila night??
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
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