Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
MIDGETS
????
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
