O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
its liver damage thursday
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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