Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
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