I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
