I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
Randomize
