so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
Randomize
