What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
Randomize