Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
Fun fact: You might be drunk if your vision is so blurry that you almost ask "do you know where my glasses are?" while you're wearing them.
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
