I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
Randomize
