Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
So after we got done with our cardiac arrest patient, I thought how awesome would it be to hook up the defibrillator pads to cook a burrito.
dude... how have they not drug tested you yet?
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Randomize
