just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
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