i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
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