i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
Randomize