Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
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