I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
we should paint friendship bongs
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
