I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
