20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
Randomize