Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
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