I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Randomize
