He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
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