His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
