I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Randomize
