Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
