I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Randomize
