Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Randomize
