he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
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