she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
Randomize