But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
this will be a night to untag.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
Sitting in bed reading a porn novel off my phone and accidentally just made Siri start reading the most graphic part aloud. FUN FIRST NIGHT WITH THE NEW ROOMIE.
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
Randomize
