I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
I don't care how drunk you were. Sending me a pic of your dick dressed as Uncle Sam with the caption "I want you" isn't an acceptable pick up line.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
