he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
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