His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
Randomize
