Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
