I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
