HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
