so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
Randomize