your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
Turn sideways at McDonald's = actual directions to a winery
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
Randomize
