it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
Randomize
