remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
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