I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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