What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
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